Let's hope I'm better at being 22 than I was at being 26

I wonder why the new year is such a big deal? Fireworks, parties, resolutions. I see why it may be a big deal for school going people since a new year usually means new subjects, perhaps new teachers. But what about working adults? The first day of this year was a Wednesday. A normal Wednesday. They didn't go to work. But then they did on Thursday. So what's the fuss? I don't know, man, but I sure as hell was excited about it!

For me, new year means a new semester at university. The second semester of my second year. In about a year and a half, I'll be done with this. Incredible. I remember starting out and thinking to myself that three years is a hell of a long time to be studying again. I was wrong.

The new year also makes me think of my impending birthday anniversary. 22 years ago (minus about a months and a half), I was born. Imagine that. Or maybe don't. I get really nervous every time my birthday approaches. Honestly, I spent at least half my waking hours yesterday feeling all nauseous and anxious over turning 22.

It's always struck me as odd that I feel nervous. I mean, why wouldn't I be excited? I'm getting older, people are more likely to take me seriously. Also, the older I get, the more control I have over my own life and my decisions. I should be happy, excited. Instead, I'm happy and anxious. All that responsibility.

Also, I can't seem to imagine myself being any age other than what I am right now. Questions like, "Where do you see yourself in 5 or 10 years?" don't work with my brain because I don't see it as me, aged 5 years older and in the future. What I see when I try to answer the question is me right now time travelling to five years in the future, pretending to know what I'm doing and behaving in the exact way me-right-now would.

I don't know what I'd be like in five years. I don't even know if I'll be alive or have the same number of limbs; how am I supposed to know what I'd be doing with my life in that time?

So yea, birthdays make me nervous. Mostly because I have no idea what the next year of my life will bring me or how I'll will have changed by the end of it. Actually, now that I think of it, I'm also nervous because of the whole responsibility thing. I mean, c'mon, who thought it'd be a good idea to let me grow up and have a set of my own car keys and control of my own bank account?

I want to be able to handle myself well. But I also want to never let go or forget the little kid inside of me. Birthdays are just another way of celebrating the addition of another horrendously boring and routine layer of adulthood over the fun and simplicity of childhood. I have to make sure I build in a giant doorway into those layers so I can access the fun whenever I want to.

Anyways, Happy New Year :)

Another round...

And here it is again, a  new year, young and full of possibilities:)

It's been a good start to my year. I had my friends and my family and lots of excitement too:)

We had a dinner at home with friends and my brother and I stayed up till 7am the next day. I only woke up at  2pm. So basically, my last day of 2012 was also my shortest day of the year! Hahhaa.

Oh well. The first day of this year has been good, to be honest. I had a nice chat with a certain Whovian which was great. He told me about this place called Forbidden Planet which is THE place for cult entertainment (that's what is says on the website: "Your Cult Entertainment Megastore). There's a store in London but they also ship to Malaysia. The have EVERYTHING Whovian and LOTR and any other fandom you can think of (I hope). I know what I'm getting myself for my birthday:) Anyways, it was a a nice conversation to start the year with.

However, I'm not too thrilled about having to wait 4 months for the next Doctor Who episode. 4 MONTHS! That's an entire semester! But then again, perhaps it's a good thing. I can concentrate on psych and think of the new episode as a reward:)

This is a big year. I start my second semester on the 7th. Then there's the whole turning 21 thing (the whole gang!). And and, by mid-July this year, I shall be done with my first year in university. Also, Pete is leaving for the UK at the end of the year (that's still far off so I'm not going to think about it). 

Davina and Peter got me this 5 year journal. I'm supposed to write one thought each day for the next 5 years. I think it's a brilliant idea. Imagine that. Writing a thought, just one thought, everyday and then going back to it after a year. Now that's really taking a walk down memory lane. I'm gonna make sure I keep some paper clips handy just in case I want to write more than one thought a day:)

Anyways, I hope we all have a great year, as always. Growing up is scary but also very exciting and I'm ready for anything.

Holmes

Right now, it's around 11.30pm. I'm going to stay up till around 12.00am because there's a chance that I might win some meet and greet passes for Simple Plan. So while I wait, I thought I'd share with the world some of my thoughts.

I've had an almost complicated start to the new year. I take it as a good sign. Since it started off complicated, it might end easy enough :) Not exactly logical, but simple.

Anyway let's talk about something else, shall we? I just saw Sherlock Holmes today. I have to say, it totally surprised me. I've never read the book but I know that Sherlock Holmes is a detective... blah blah. I was a little apprehensive about the movie because Robert Downey Jr was starring in it.

Don't get me wrong, I love RDJr, I just didn't think he'd be the right guy to play Sherlock Holmes. He's seemed kind of rigid and incapable of bringing to life a classic character. Now I know that I'll probably never make it big as a casting director. RDJr was perfect! He was charming, intelligent, annoying and has impeccable comedic timing.

That movie was great! I'm sure that it didn't stay completely true to the book. I learnt that allowances sometimes have to be made and adjustments are required because what works great in books might no do so well on screen. I think the movie version of Sherlock Holmes is ingenious. My favourite character is Dr. Watson!

Watching that movie today makes me want to do three things (or at least one or two of three things).

• Watch Sherlock Holmes 1
• Read as many Sherlock Holmes Novels as I can find
• Start talking like a Brit

Like I said, one or two of three. :)

Anyway, it's almost 12am now. I can still squeeze in one more thought. Here it is: Try and try again. If you really want something, trying won't feel tedious at all. In fact, it becomes quite interesting.


I'll leave that as it is:)


*I just checked out that possibility I was talking about earlier. As it turns out, they're not giving out meet and greet passes. Instead, I might be entitled to one free Rockzone ticket to watch Avril Lavigne live in KL. Hmm..

I'll Miss You, 2010

I hate this part right here!

It's great to be moving to a whole new year, another cycle, another adventure. I just hate leaving the good stuff behind. I have to leave Friday's and the family that comes with it (I'll miss Boss the most!). I'll have to leave behind the environment of working with adults. It's back to school with people my age (not my kind of crowd) and homework and stuff. I know I have to move on, to study and build a life for myself but I just hate leaving everything behind except a few memories. My last two days at work were the best and worst this whole year! I met some friends I know I'll keep for life and I've met some truly annoying people. I had heart stopping moments and butterflies in my stomach moments and moments where I just wish I could pause for a bit longer. There were a lot of 'what if's' and 'oh my..' moments too. The last two days were filled with said moments. It was as if they were trying to fit the quota before the year ended. I have a feeling that 2011 might be different. There will be a lot more moments and people. I can only hope that things work out the way I want and expect it too.

It's safe to say that I finally feel like an adult (mostly). No need to mention who, but some people I've met this year have helped me figure it out and I thank them for it. I know a lot more about myself. I realise that I have more self control than I thought. Also, I can be very emotional and clingy:)

I don't want to loose touch with some of the people I've met this year (most of them are Friday's staff). If you know me, you know that I'm not the kind of person to remember birthday's or try and keep in touch. However, I've met some truly amazing people whom I don't ever want to forget. So I'll try and hopefully, we'll be in touch always.

I have to prepare myself for a whole year of being in school. Honestly, I don't want to be there but I need to and I'll do my best there because I want a great future. I'll make sure I have people that matter around me all the time (Crazy says: the best things is to have a few people that matter as opposed to many people who don't). That will be the best thing that could possibly happen.

Anyway, enough philosophy.... for now.
Happy 2011